Umm...relief from what?

Caffiene withdrawal?

When I run the world....

...it will be illegal to tow a recreational vehicle on the freeway on Friday morning, while all the rest of us slags are driving to WORK! Ass.

And the award for Most Disturbing Display of Baby Wear....

Goes to Macy's at the Woodlands Mall! *applause*

You know those ad boards you see in the restrooms?

Yeah, this was one in the LADIES room.

Sure was a good idea....

...to put all that wire and barbs and pokey stuff up there in the awning outside of Macy's so that birds couldn't get into it. Yep.

Not all corporate types....

...front with a Wall Street Journal. Some unabashedly pass time at the bus stop with their PS3.

I like to take pizza onto the elevator and jack up the diets of people that ride it afterward.

Not that there's anything WRONG with that...

how to....

Make sure your bike doesn't get stolen in downtown Houston even WITHOUT the lock.

Well Duh...

Because we all know that makes stars fall out of their heads.